A few years ago a friend of mine asked me to join a band that he was putting together. I offered him full disclosure about my complete lack of musical talent and ability nut he was persistent about me joining. He needed a drummer and I was assured that I could be taught all that I needed to play. So, I agreed, and right away visions of rock stardom entered my head. Teenage fantasies of destroying hotel rooms, tour buses, and violent drug fueled arguments with my band mates seemed to be within my reach.

As it turns out the guy was talking about starting up a fife and drum band. For those who don't know, on the spectrum of all things cool, fife and drum bands fall roughly in the same area as Star Trek conventions and Dungeons and Dragons tournaments. The only thing that makes fife and drum slightly cooler that those things is copious amounts of free beer. I have a full Revolutionary War outfit complete with triangle hat and wool jacket and cape. I get to march down streets during parades wearing this stuff, having little kids think that I am apirate and swaeting my ass off. Becaues as everyone knows parades are held during the summer when nobody in their right mind would think of putting on a wool outfit and walking around in the sun.

One can only imagine my disappointment when I had a vision in my head of this...



But instead I got this....

Like I said, pretty much polar opposites on the spectrum of cool stuff. and by the way what the hell were people thinking back then? I mean that stuff they wear is really uncomfortable. Nodody could figure out shorts? And the fact that a person does not always have to wear long sleeves? Anyway, think of me the next time you watch a parade.